7 times when you should just say thank you, but don't

I don"t say “Thank You” as often as I should và I doubt I"m the only one.

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In fact, I"m starting khổng lồ believe sầu that “Thank You” is the most under-appreciated và under-used phrase on the planet. It is appropriate in nearly any situation and it is a better response than most of the things we say. Let"s cover 7 comtháng situations when we say all sorts of things, but should say “Thank You” instead. 1

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1. Say “Thank You” when you"re receiving a compliment.

We often ruin compliments by devaluing the statement or acting overly humble. Internally, you might think this prevents you from appearing arrogant or smug.

The problem is that by deflecting the praise of a genuine compliment, you don"t acknowledge the person who was nice enough to say something. Simply saying “Thank You” fully acknowledges the person who made the compliment and allows you to lớn enjoy the moment as well.

Example: “Your dress looks great.”

Instead of: “Oh, this old thing? I"ve had it for years.”Try saying: “Thank you. I"m glad you lượt thích it.”

Example: “Wow! 20 points tonight. You played really well in the game.”

Instead of: “Yeah, but I missed that wide-open shot in the 3rd quarter.”Try saying: “Thank you. It was a good night.”

Example: “You killed your presentation today!”

Instead of: “Did I? I felt so nervous up there. I"m glad it looked alright.”Try saying: “Thank you. I"m happy it went well.”

There is something empowering about fully accepting a compliment. When you deflect praise, you can"t really own it. When you just say “Thank You,” you let the weight of the compliment sink in & become yours. Saying “Thank You” gives your mind permission lớn be built up by the compliments you receive.

Getting compliments should be fun & enjoyable, but we often ruin the experience. There’s no need to lớn sabotage compliments that come your way. Accept them with grace and enjoy the moment. 2

2. Say “Thank You” when you’re running late.

Being late is the worst. It"s stressful for the person who is running late và it"s disrespectful to lớn the person who is waiting.

It might seem strange khổng lồ thank someone for dealing with your hassle, but that"s exactly the correct response. Most people stumble in the door and say, “Sorry I"m late.”

The problem is this response still makes the situation about you. Sorry, I"m late. Saying “Thank You” turns the tables và acknowledges the sacrifice the other person made by waiting. Thank you for waiting. 3

Example: You walk in the door 14 minutes late.

Instead of: “So sorry I’m late. Traffic was insane out there.”Try saying: “Thank you for your patience.”

When we make a mistake, someone else often makes a sacrifice. Our mặc định response is to lớn apologize for our failure, but the better approach is lớn praise their patience và loyalty. Thank them for what they did despite your error.

3. Say “Thank You” when you"re comforting someone.

When someone comes to you with bad news, it can be awkward. You want khổng lồ be a good friover, but most people don"t know what lớn say. I know I"ve sầu felt that way before.

Often times, we think it"s a good idea to lớn add a silver lining to lớn the problem. “Well, at least you have…”

What we fail to realize is that it doesn"t matter if you don"t know what to lớn say. All you really need is lớn be present and thank them for trusting you.

Example: Your co-worker"s mother passed away recently.

Instead of: “At least you have sầu a lot of fond memories to lớn hold onto.”Try saying: “Thank you for sharing that with me. I know this is a hard time for you.”

Example: Your brother lost his job.

Instead of: “At least you have your health.”Try saying: “Thank you for sharing this with me. I"m here to lớn support you.”

Example: Your friend"s pet just died.

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Instead of: “At least they had a long và happy life.”Try saying: “Thank you for sharing that with me. I"m here for you.”

In times of suffering, we don"t need to lớn hear words lớn ease the pain as much as we need someone lớn chia sẻ our pain. When you don"t know what to lớn say, just say “Thank You” và be there.

4. Say “Thank You” when you"re receiving helpful feedback.

Feedbachồng can be very helpful, but we rarely see it that way. Whether it is an unflattering performance Reviews from your trùm or an tin nhắn from an unhappy customer, the standard reaction is to lớn get defensive. That"s a shame because the correct response is to simply say, “Thank You” and use the information to lớn improve sầu.

Example: “This work isn"t good enough. I thought you would do better.”

Instead of: “You don"t underst&. Here"s what really happened.”Try saying: “Thank you for expecting more of me.”

Example: “I bought your hàng hóa last week and it already broke. I am not happy with this experience.”

Instead of: “How did you use it? We made it very clear in our terms và conditions that the product is not designed to work in certain conditions.“Try saying: “Thank you for sharing your thoughts. Please know we are committed to lớn becoming better. Can you chia sẻ more details about the issue?”

Notoàn thân likes to lớn fail, but failure is just a data point. Respond khổng lồ helpful feedback with thanks và use it lớn become better. 4

5. Say “Thank You” when you"re receiving unfair criticism.

Sometimes criticism isn"t helpful at all. It"s just vindictive sầu and mean. I"ve sầu written about how lớn deal with haters previously, but one of the best approaches is khổng lồ just say thank you và move on.

When you thank someone for criticizing you, it immediately neutralizes the power of their statements. If it’s not a big giảm giá to you, then it can’t grow inkhổng lồ a larger argument.

Example: “This might be good advice for beginners, but anyone who knows what they are doing will find this useless.”

Instead of: “Well, clearly, I wrote this for beginners. This might be a surprise, but not everything was written with you in mind.”Try saying: “Thank you for sharing your opinion. I’ll try khổng lồ improve sầu next time.”

Example: “Your statement is the dumbest thing I"ve read all week.”

Instead of: “You"re an idiot. Let me tell you why…”Try saying: “Thank you for the feedbaông xã. I still have sầu a lot khổng lồ learn.”

Releasing the need to lớn win every argument is a sign of maturity. Someone on the mạng internet said something wrong? So what. Win the argument by the way you live sầu your life.

6. Say “Thank You” when someone gives you unsolicited advice.

This shows up a lot in the gym. Everybody has an opinion about what your technique should look lượt thích. I think most people are just trying to be helpful, but hearing someone"s opinion about you when you didn"t ask for it can be annoying.

One time, someone pointed out some flaws in my squat technique in a video clip I posted online. I responded by sarcastically asking if he had a video of himself doing it correctly. Somewhere deep in my mind, I assumed that if I reminded hyên ổn that his technique wasn"t perfect, then I would feel better about the fact that mine wasn"t perfect either. That"s an unnecessary và defensive sầu response.

The better approach? Just say “Thank You.”

Example: “You know, you should really keep your hips back when you do that exercise.”

Instead of: “Oh really? Do you have a video clip of yourself doing it so I can see it done correctly?”Try saying: “Thank you for the help.”

Pointing out others faults doesn"t remove your own. Thank people for raising your self-awareness, even if it was unsolicited.

7. Say “Thank You” when you"re not sure if you should thank someone.

When in doubt, just say thank you. There is no downside. Are you honestly worried about showing too much gratitude lớn the people in your life?

“Should I skết thúc a Thank You card in this situation?” Yes, you should.